---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Ruth Soukup <ruth@ruthsoukup.com>
Date: Friday, April 5, 2019
Subject: This is why I probably shouldn't drive….
To: joaoa.desilva2018@gmail.com
Happy Friday!
It's been in Nashville all week, first to attend a workshop and then to record the audio version of the upcoming book, Do It Scared®. These days we travel a lot for business, and while we don't really mind flying, altgough that's scary, as well or staying in strange hotels, there is one part of travel that I don't enjoy—having to rent a car.
I don't like driving in the best of circumstances, but there is just something incredibly stressful and scary to me about the combination of trying to figure out a new car while also trying to navigate a new city and unfamiliar roads. Thanks to GPS. In fact, normally when I travel, I will try to avoid driving altogether and just Uber or cop a Lyft where I need to go. But that's not always an option.
Last week in Phoenix, after picking up my vehicle at the airport rental center, I managed to make it the 16 or so miles to my initial destination without issue.
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I then spent the day in meetings, followed by lunch and dinner at a nearby restaurant(s), and by the time I was ready to head to my hotel, it was already dark.
I turned on the car, took a few minutes to program the GPS ( and my cellphone's 'Navigator' as a backup ) so I would know where I was going, and then turned out of the parking lot onto a busy, well-lit street. It was so well-lit, in fact, that I didn't notice at first that my instrument panel didn't seem to be fully lit up or that the headlights were on or not.
Until, that is, other cars on the road began 'flashing' their lights at me, and the man in official looking uniform inside his SUV opened his passenger door to yell out to me and the man in a truck next to me on the other side, rolled down his window to yell out to me, in stereo, what I had already figured out on my own—my lights weren't on. I thank the Lord, cops did see it beforehand or was the man in uniform a off duty official!?... I especially hate this when, I'm outside the country.
Except, given that it was an unfamiliar car and I was completely in the dark, I had NO IDEA how to turn the lights on. Trying not to panic while waiting at a yellow light going, red light, I fumbled around the dash, hitting switches, knobs and buttons for what felt like an eternity, until magically and mercifully, the lights finally flashed on.
By that point, my heart was beating so hard it felt like it might come out of my chest, my hands were shaking and I was sweating profusely, but my little driving adventure wasn't over yet—not by a long shot. I still had 10 miles to go to make it to the hotel.
I merged onto the freeway, as it started to rain and then, as I crept along in the right-hand lane, while others are flying by me, I worked hard on calming myself down.
"Come on Ruth, you've got this. Just do it scared. You talk to people about overcoming their fears every single day—you just need to do it scared. You've got eight miles to go, just stay right here in the slow lane and you'll be fine."
Then, just as I was beginning to feel my heartbeat return to normal—I saw something up ahead. A car spun around, did a 360 in the wet slippery pavement (when it rains the motor oil deposits come up out of the ground). A car stopped in my lane with their hazard lights on, facing me and no way to get over with the cars speeding by in the lane next to me. Panic time....
I slammed on my brakes, stood on then and prayed others are capable of stopping before hitting me in a domino effect, and I quickly scanned all my mirrors, found a slot to get my vehicle in, a next lane chicane ... managed to get around the stopped vehicle just in the nick of time, white knuckled, gripping the steering wheel as if, my life just depended on it.
Let me just tell you—those 10 miles felt like 1000s!
But I made it. I'm here to tell the tale. And as mortifying as this story is to admit to you, I think it does hold a few important lessons.
1.) We're all scared of something. Your fear might not be driving, but chances are good that there are at least a few things that hold you back and keep you stuck sometimes. Maybe it's the fear of making a mistake or the fear of what other people might think of you. Maybe it's just being afraid that you'll get it wrong, or that you're not quite capable. Maybe it's all of the above. And whether it is crippling anxiety or just mild discomfort, at some point, we all experience fear in some way or another.
2.) Sometimes you have to want it more than you're scared of it. In this case, my desire to get to where I needed to be overrode my fear of driving a strange car in a strange city. But what I've noticed is that every time I am able to face a fear head-on, it's because the thing I want is bigger than what I'm scared of. Whether it was attending my first conference, being on video, speaking in public, or any other number of things that have terrified me and threatened to hold me back, I've found that the one thing that pushes me forward is staying focused on the big goal—and the WHY behind that goal.
3.) Courage is just like a muscle. The more you exercise it, the stronger it gets. Every time you push yourself to do something a little bit scary or uncomfortable, you give yourself more courage to do the next scary, uncomfortable thing. Or, in my case, the courage to rent another car again this week. (And, for the record, I figured out how to turn the lights on BEFORE I left the parking lot!)
Roger von Oech once noted that "everyone has a 'risk muscle.' You keep it in shape by trying new things. If you don't, it atrophies. Make a point of using it at least once a day." Along those same lines, Oprah Winfrey said "do the one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time. The only people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire. This is your moment. Own it."
In other words? Keep pushing past your comfort zone. It's the only way to know what you're really capable of and what your capacities are for real.
And so, my challenge for you this week is to do just that—push past your comfort zone. Do something that scares you, even if it is just something little. Speak up. Try something new. Ask for help. Be brave. Just, DO IT!
You might just be amazed at what happens next!
The purpose of life, is a purposeful life!
Live with purpose, friends, fans, followers, and have a great week!
Cheers,
Jon-jon
P.S. And speaking of building that courage muscle, be sure to join our free 5-Day Confidence Challenge! The feedback we've gotten so far has been incredible! It's completely free—simply CLICK HERE to join!
P.P.S. Have you pre-ordered your copy of Do It Scared? We noticed that the price just dropped on Amazon! Grab it HERE, then fill out the form to get all your bonuses HERE! (Plus, when you pre-order the book by May 8 and then fill out the bonus form, you'll also receive a special invitation to join our exclusive book launch team, which will give you early access to the book, as well as access to a private book club with me!)
xoxo, %Ruth
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